Keeping your house clean after having a baby

Photo: Yolanda Christopher, yourunexpectedbeauty.com

An alternate title for this post could be "How to do the impossible" because it is really darn near impossible for a new mom to keep her house spotless.  Heck, it is tough for any mom to keep her house clean.  That said, there are some tips and tricks I learned along the way to keep my home "presentable" during the crazy, sleep-deprived newborn period, especially if you have other kids to contend with.

1. Look for dual-action products.  They will save you time and money.  I really like Palmolive Fresh Sponge.  I was sent some for review and it smells great.  With a new baby there's usually bottles, breast pumps, or other items that are not dishwasher safe so have a dish soap that works well, smells good, AND keeps your sponge for smelling gross is great.
2. Set your bar a little lower.  Or a lot lower.  I found that if I just picked up the toys, put the dishes away, and tried to stay on top of the laundry I was doing pretty well.  The months following the birth of a baby are not ones to worry about your base boards or polishing your floors.  And I have learned the value of paper plates.  I know they aren't great for the environment and add an extra expense, but they make clean up so darn easy!
3. Be sure to clean up the crumbs.  Nothing brings ants (and other really gross bugs) into your house like crumbs from kids. And with a new baby you don't want to have to worry about bugs.  I like the Swiffer for keeping the floors clean.  It picks up crumbs and can clean up the spills and splashes my big kids seem to make at every meal.  Plus, it's easy and I can do it one-handed (as opposed to a broom and dustpan or mop and bucket).  I was sent the new Swiffer WetJet and it works really well on my hardwood floors.  It also dries really quickly which is a bonus because I can't keep my kids off the floor for very long.
4. For goodness sake, ask for help!  Even if you don't have family around (like me) friends and neighbors are usually great when they know what you need.  Don't want someone else folding your skivvies?  Why not ask them to hold the baby for 30 minutes while you get some stuff done?  
5. Find a product you like and stick with it. My new favorite product is the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.  My kids like to color on the walls, splash grape juice on the walls, and leave lots of little fingerprints all over the house.  The magic eraser cleans them up really quickly and nearly effortlessly.  My two year old recently used a crayon on the walls leading upstairs right before we had company coming over.  The magic eraser wiped it off like it was...an eraser.

The bottom line is that babies are only little once, and while it's hard to stop being the perfectionist you usually are, cut yourself some slack.  Do the best you can with whatever time you can find.  The kids will grow up and you will have a nice, clean, quiet home in about 18 years.  (Or so I'm told.)

Disclosure:  I received some products for review from Proctor & Gamble and Colgate (Palmolive).  I was not compensated for this post, though and even if I was, the opinions are 100% my own.

Dear Chick Fil A...

Cole enjoys a Chick Fil A milkshake recently.

Dear Chick Fil A,
You are one of my family's favorite restaurant chains and I need you to get out of the news.  You weren't in the news for your piping hot waffle fries, your fresh peach milkshakes, or your delicious original chicken sandwich.  It wasn't even for your great service or community initiatives.  You were in the news because of what some consider a political stance made by your president and COO, Dan Cathy.

According to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, an uproar ensued after Cathy gave interviews saying he supports "the biblical definition of the family unit", which many people around the country understand as opposition to gay marriage.   Some activists see it as an example of a homophobic or anti-gay business.  I just see it as a shame.


Now I'm not going to go all political on you.  I think everyone has the right to their own opinions.  I'm obviously in a "traditional" marriage.  I attend a conservative Christian church.  I grew up in a very conservative city and family.  I get where Dan Cathy is coming from, but I don't think he should have said what he said in such a public forum.  I think you, Chick Fil A, should stick to making those darn good sandwiches and leave politics and polarizing social issues alone.  


I've always appreciated your Christian values and believed that you followed the Golden Rule very well.  As far as I could see, you treat everyone with the same respect you'd expect in return.  I sure hope that's still the case.  I choose to believe that it is.


I don't want to give up my Chick Fil A fix, but I also don't want to be associated with Mike Huckabee.  I just want to eat some chicken, let the kids play in the play areas, and enjoy a nice lunch.  So Chick Fil A, please stay out of the news, stay out of politics, and just stay in your delicious chicken-making lane.  I don't want to make a statement with my lunch.


Sincerely,
Maria

Expecting the unexpected

(This post is a sponsored post I was planning to write on the same subject, but after the tragic shooting in Colorado last week I felt even more compelled to write it. I am heart broken for the victims and their families and pray for them daily.  I want everyone to know that tragedy doesn't just happen to other people, that everyone needs to expect the unexpected in life.)

I went to the movies last Thursday night. It was my first time going out with friends since having baby #4. We went to a screening of the 80's classic, Dirty Dancing, to celebrate the 25th anniversary of its release. We left around 11:30pm, seeing the scores of teeny boppers lined up to see the midnight screenings of "Dark Knight".  The teens were laughing and having fun, waiting for a movie they were excited to see. Everything was as it should be. But within a couple hours, everything seemed to change.

I know I was in Atlanta, thousands of miles away from the late night massacre in Aurora, Colorado, but it felt really close to me. The teens crowded together at the theater I went to were just like the ones in Colorado. There were moms at that theatre just like me. Could I have been one of those 12 killed or the 58 wounded? Could something that terrible happen to me or someone I love? The short answer is "yes".  And that scares me.

As much as I don't want to think about it, the truth is that I could die at any time. My husband could die at any time. And then what would become of the rest of the family? How would I, a stay-at-home mom, pay for my home and take care of my family? How would my husband pay for child care for four children? The only way to know for sure is to make sure we have enough life insurance. And one thing I know for sure is that both of us need life insurance. According to Forbes, "if the stay-at-home spouse passes away, the cost to replace what they do on a daily basis could be astronomical."

Do you have life insurance?  Do you have enough?  You can find out an estimate of how much life insurance you need by checking out this calculator:



This post was sponsored by Genworth Financial. As always the opinions are my own. And remember, they are opinions. Please seek out your own financial advise to fit your specific situation.

Pray for the best, Prepare for the worst: Lessons in home ownership

In 2005, my then-boyfriend (now husband) and I bought a condo in Chicago at the height of the real estate bubble. I didn't know the first thing about the nitty-gritty parts of the home buying experience. I just loved the unit, the view and the proximity to everything.  So I signed on the dotted lines (all of them) and hoped for the best.  After all, what could go wrong? Ha! 


When the housing bubble burst, our condo lost half its value almost overnight. We accepted a move to Atlanta, got married, started a family and still had this condo, like a ball and chain around our necks, for years. We finally got out from under it two years ago, but the stress it caused financially and emotionally was enormous.


Fast forward to today, we are looking to buy a house again. We have four kids and need to settle down in a home, not just another place to live. This time though, since I am older and wiser, I am educating myself on the ins and outs of the home buying process. I am making sure I am prepared for the worst, while still praying for the best.


Since I am on a self-education quest, here are three important things I've learned about buying a home:


1. Understand PMI (private mortgage insurance). This is a fee you will pay if you put down less than 20% for a down payment. When calculating how much owning a particular home will cost you, don't forget about PMI. This fee may help you qualify for a loan faster and get you into a home quicker though, so it is not necessarily a bad thing depending on your situation.

2. Housing markets DO go down. Plan to be in your home for at least five years before thinking of selling it. Even though the markets are slowly turning around (in some areas more than others) you can't plan on a quick "flip". Buy a home you want to live in and you wont have to worry (too much) about its resale value.

3. Location, location, location.  Just because your kids aren't old enough to attend school now doesn't mean you don't have to check out the public school options for the house your looking to buy.  Private schools in many places can cost upwards of $20,000 per year, per child, while public schools are free.  When you're house hunting with kids in tow, there are many factors to consider. Check out the 2012 list of best places to raise children for some great information about cities in your own state.

Buying a home can be scary, but it also can be a source of pride. Just be smart and learn from the lessons this recession (should have) taught us all.  Want to hear more?  Check out Brian's home ownership story:





This post was sponsored by Genworth Financial. As always the opinions are my own. And remember, they are opinions. Please seek out your own financial advise to fit your specific situation.

A letter to myself (and all new moms)

(This is the letter I'm sure I'd write to myself years from now when the diapers and sleepless nights and nursing stages are done. This is the letter I'd read over and over on days like yesterday that are particularly tough.)

Dear New Mom,
I can tell today was a rough day, in a week of rough days, in a month of rough days. You feel overwhelmed and tired and not yourself. You're nursing all the time, while potty training and getting snacks and cleaning the kitchen. You can hear yourself yelling too much and lacking the patience you need to have. The kids won't nap, though that's something you only dream of doing, the house is a mess, and even though it's 6 pm you haven't even thought about dinner. I'm here to tell you, it gets better. Just hold on.

It doesn't seem possible now but those kids will grow up and be able to pour their own darn juice. They will bathe themselves and read their own books and get themselves breakfast in the morning. It gets better, Mom.  Just hold on.

You will sleep through the night again. You will have a clean home again. You will wear pre-baby clothes again. You'll actually be able to have a glass of Moscato without having to think about your breastfeeding schedule. There will come a time when leaving the house with all your kids will seem natural and even easy, and you will look back on today and laugh.  I promise you that you will laugh.

It is hard being a new mom.  Whether this is your first rodeo, your fourth or your fourteenth, people expect you to get the hang of it way before you actually do. You are being pulled in a hundred different directions and feel frazzled most days, overwhelmed the others. It doesn't take much to make you cry. Know that you are not alone. And just hold on.

Focus on getting through today, or maybe just this afternoon, or even just the next 30 minutes. Know that you are a great mom, that your kids love you and know you love them. Keep praying. Keep putting one pedicure-needing foot in front of the other. Keep believing that children, even sticky, tantrum-throwing ones, are blessings from God.

Years from now, in a quiet moment, you will remember the sweet newborn smell and the warmth of a tiny body snuggling against you.  You will remember seeing the heart-melting first smiles, and the feel of five little fingers wrapping around your one.  And you will wish you savored these days...these hard, stressful, wonderful, crazy days...just a little more. It gets better, and goes by in a blink of an eye.  Just hold on.

Love always,
You

My newest sweet tiny baby and I.

Talk about the future with your family this Fourth of July

The Fourth of July is a great time for getting together with family. There's cookouts, fireworks, and all the good home-cooked food you wish you could make at your own house. Families often sit around with a glass of sweet tea (or maybe something stronger), and chat about the weather, the local baseball team, or maybe the just neighbor's daughter. But instead of idle chitchat this year, use the time to talk about some of the more important things in life...like planning for the future.

It isn't easy to talk to your parents about the possibility of long-term care in the future.  It may not come natural to chat with your spouse about the need for life insurance.  And it may not be fun to look into mortgage insurance.  However, all three of these issues need to be discussed now...before a crisis hits.  I propose you use the time spent "porch sitting" at the Fourth of July barbecues, to get the conversation started about these important subjects.  According to the 2011 Genworth "Financial Reality Check" survey, 73% of Americans would not know what to do if they received a call today saying a family member needed long term care.  Don't let that be you.

For some tips on how and why to get the conversation started, check out "Let's Talk" magazine:


Look for articles from me in the coming month on the three key financial issues facing families right now:

1. Long term care giving
2. Buying (and keeping) a house
3. Planning for the unexpected

While we may not want to talk about these things, we need to, and now is as good of a time as any.  So go ahead, start the conversation.  Make sure your future Fourth of July's are just as sweet.

Disclosure:  This is a sponsored post.  I was compensated for writing it but the opinions expressed are entirely my own.